As I have entered week seven post-op from a total knee replacement my thinking cap has been relocated and is now in full operation! Now that I have regained my ability to drive the car, and walk with a cane my brain has gone into overdrive with all the things that should soon follow. Of course getting into the studio to make art is one of those things.
I continue to be hounded by these thoughts that I should get in there soon and pick up where I left off. Where I left off actually was with two pieces pinned to the design wall with the intention of inspiring me to just ‘start’ again. One is designed and ready to be stitched and the second has been painted but remains in need of design.
As the remnants of 3 types of anesthesia began to wear off during week four I became aware that not much had filled up my creative well during those 3 previous weeks. I had been magnetized to the iPad for entertainment and communication. As anyone who has spent too much time online knows, it sucks the life-force out of you; it just does not replenish at all. I read ONE book and countless magazines, played hundreds of games of scrabble but not a lot of creative energy went in aside from sleeping 11-12 hours a night producing great healing results.
So just as I got the nagging thoughts that I should be back in the studio making art I happened upon these words in the Tao…don’t think so hard, don’t think so much…act without thinking. I THINK I will do that!
Am rereading Kabat-Zinn’s Wherever You Go…focused on the non-doing part right now. Letting it happen as it will without a lot of tinkering on my part. Just let it move through you, Carol, without your thinking you need to direct the energy. It will find its own path.